Sex & Bland

This movie review is made possible by omy.sg.

So I was invited to a movie preview of Sex & Zen: Extreme Ecstasy (3D). No, it wasn’t at the Yangtze, which is well-known for its sleazy movie screenings. And yes, I was disappointed. Not because I didn’t get to go to Yangtze. =x But because the movie, which is loosely adapted on its comedic predecessors, has been censored to the point where the plot is reduced into a meaningless love story. 18 minutes worth of sex, torture and rape were cut out but they left images of a huge penis intact. =x

The story is supposed to be about this scholar who wants to improve his sex life because his manhood is un-endearingly small. So he goes for a penis transplant, gets a huge one and proceeds to perform a mass orgy with his patron’s harem. But you won’t see this in the movie because it has been cut out. =x

I don’t mind a little constructive censoring but when important scenes are switched around or cut out for the sake of preserving our *ahem* morality, then the movie might as well be shown exclusively at Yangtze so hentai jijis can enjoy it in its entirety. =x

Oh but Yangtze doesn’t have a 3D screen, right. Time for an upgrade then. =x Hurhur.

It does have a touching ending where the main characters, now an elderly couple, explains to a newly-wed couple why sex isn’t important in a marriage but by this time, you don’t give a damn because…

all the sex has been cut out.

Hurhur.

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